The Army, Navy and the Air Force

Discussion in 'OGF Comedy Corner' started by Toxic, Dec 17, 2007.

  1. Toxic

    Toxic Defensor Fortis

    The Army, Navy and the Air Force decided to have a canoe race on the Potomac River. Each team practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

    On the big day, the Navy won by a mile. Afterwards, the Air Force team became very discouraged and depressed. The officers of the Air Force team decided the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found: A "Metrics Team" made up of senior officers was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate actions.
    Their conclusion was that the Navy had eight enlisted rowing and one officer steering, while the Air Force had one enlisted rowing and eight officers steering. So the senior officers of the Air Force team hired a Consulting company and paid them incredible amounts of money. The consultants advised that too many people were steering the boat and not enough people were rowing.

    To prevent losing to the Navy again next year, the Air Force Chief of Staff made historic and sweeping changes: The rowing team's organizational structure was totally realigned to four steering officers, three area steering superintendents and one assistant superintendent steering officer. They also implemented a new performance system that would give the one airman rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the "Rowing Team Quality Air Force Program," with meetings, dinners, and a three-day pass for the rower. "We must give the rower empowerment and enrichment through this quality program."

    The next year the Navy won by 2 miles. Humiliated, the Air Force leadership gave a letter of reprimand to the rower for poor performance, initiated a $4 billion program for development of a new joint service canoe, blamed the loss on design defects in the paddles and issued leather rowing jackets to the beleaguered steering officers in the hopes they would stay for next years race.

    Meanwhile, the Army team is still trying to figure out why the oars keep making divots in the dirt when they row.
     
  2. ezbite

    ezbite the Susan Lucci of OGF

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    LOL, dont feel bad jess, everyone loses to "THE NAVY":p
     

  3. WAY TOO GO NAVY ................. THE REASON I SAY THAT IS BECAUSE I WAS IN THE NAVY IN VIETNAM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GIT RRR DONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!pappysgto@aol.com
     
  4. Gju42486

    Gju42486 Banned

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    shoot, you all are lucky the coast guard wasnt invited, it would of been a fight for last place everytime, the clear winners would of been us. We couldnt even consider it a "race" it would just be another training session like always. :C :C :C
     
  5. Toxic

    Toxic Defensor Fortis

    I retired from the Air Force and when I read that, I thought how true :D

    Tom, I thought you would like that one. George, come on the Coasties don't even have a football team. But I bet you guys can play some mean kickball LOL. :rolleyes:
     
  6. Gju42486

    Gju42486 Banned

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    now now now, we have a football team......i think we're still in the jr league though, thats why we dont get much attention....we dominate the pee wee teams, ages 8-14, for some reason, they just cant keep up.
     
  7. Toxic

    Toxic Defensor Fortis

    LMAO :D :D
     
  8. Where were the Marines when all this was going on?
    Oh yeah, probably winning a war!!:D
     
  9. Toxic

    Toxic Defensor Fortis

    Or they were waiting for the Navy to buy them new gear LOL! !@
     
  10. Seaturd

    Seaturd Catcher of Fish

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    The Marines didn't need no stinkin' canoes to win that race.... they woulda won it with a homemade raft.
     
  11. ezbite

    ezbite the Susan Lucci of OGF

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    now THATS funny, i dont care what uniform you wear.:p
     
  12. well the marines couldnt figure out what side was up on the canoe, better luck next year.. go navy
     
  13. Y airybudy thinc Marines is dum?:confused:
     
  14. The navy is real nice give the marines a ride where evr they need to go
     
  15. iwdavefish

    iwdavefish Fishin' Fanatic

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    No one invited the Marines because we bring guns.
     
  16. Very funny! Spent eight years in the Air Force and I saw it first-hand. The funnier thing is that this same thing happens in commercial business too.
     
  17. Ha ha ! that sure sounds like the air force I know.