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ship wrecked

Discussion in 'OGF Comedy Corner' started by harry1, Dec 3, 2004.

  1. ed finaly decides to take a vacation. he books himself on a carabean cruise and has the time of his life untill the boats sinks.

    he finds himself on a deserted island. no supplies, no people....nothing. only bananas and coconuts.

    after four months of this, he is lying on the beach when the best looking woman he has ever seen rows up to him. in disbelife he asks her "who are you? where did you come from?"

    "i rowed from the other side of the island" she replied "i landed here when my cruise ship sank"

    "amazing" he said "you were realy lucky to have a row boat wash up with you"

    "oh this?" she replied "i made this out of materials i found here on the island. the oars were whittled from gum tree branches; the bottom was woven from palm tree branches; and the sides and bottom came from a eucalypus tree."

    "that's impossible" says ed "you had no tools or hardware. how di you do it?'

    "it wasn't a problem" replies the woman "on the south side of the island there is an unusual strata of aluvial rock exposed

    i found that if i melted it to a certain temperatue in my kiln, it melted into forgable ductile iron. that's what i used to amke the tools and from there the hardware" ed was stunned

    "let's row over to my place" she said.

    after a few minutes of rowing they arrive at a small dock.

    ed looks onto the shore, he nearly falls out of the boat. before him is a stone walk leading up to an exqusit bungalow painted in blue and white. while the woman ties up the boat with a perfectly woven hemp rope, he could only stare ahead, dumb struck.

    as they walk into the house she says casualy, "would you care for any thing to drink?"

    "no thanks" he says "i'm sick of coconut juice"

    "it's not coconut juice" she says "i have a still. how about a pina colada?"

    trying to hide his amazement, he accepts, and they sit down on the couch to talk.

    after they exchange their stories, the woman announces " i'm going up stairs to slip into something more comfortable. would you like to take a shower and a shave? there's a razor upstairs in the cabinet in bathroom."

    no longer questioning any thing ed goes into the bathroom. there he finds a razor with a carved bone handle and a blade made from two rounded sharpened shells. in side there is a swivel mechanisn.

    'wow that's amazing" he muses "i wonder what's next"

    when he returns she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically placed, and smelling of gardenias.

    she motions him to sit down next to her. "tell me" she begins sugestivly, while slithering closer "we've been out here for a realy long time. you've been lonely. there's something i'm sure you realy feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for all these months. you know...." she stares into his eyes.

    he can't belive his ears. "you mean" he swallows excitedly, "i can check my e-mail from here?"
  2. mrfishohio

    mrfishohio Recovering Fishaholic

    Yep...four months without email could do that to anyone.......