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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Please add any great ones you have.

Called my 84 yo fishin buddy today about 5:15PM. (Names eliminated.) Haven't spoken to him in two weeks.

(Me) Hey boss....

Hi

How ya been doin?

Good.

What ya doin tomorrow?

Nothin.

Wanna go fishin?

Sure.

How 'bout my house at 7:30?

I'll be there.
Click.
**************

I've fished with this guy a couple yrs now. He will arrive between 6:50 and 7:10.....and b.... about me not being ready. Once we're fishin, silence.

About 73 minutes later, he'll be tellin me if I was on time we'ld be catchin more fish.

Life is good.
 

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Trout7 is the same way. I tell him to be at my house at 5:30 a.m.

I get out of the shower at 5:05, and he's in the living room, sitting in my favorite chair, telling me that my dogs suck as watchdogs.
 

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Called my buddy mike second day of deer season at 0500 "on my way" sat around till 7 and went out by myself. At 1100 he calls me and says he fell asleep putting his boots on. 115 we park the truck 200 we split up and I sit down 215 hear a shot. 230 staring on awe at an 18 point 189 7/8 buck. Buddy says "good for me I am goin back to bed when we get this thing home". Talk about heated!! Haven't been out with him since.
 

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I was helping a buddy move a few weeks agao...We were carrying a big couch out of his house...he was in the front and I was in the back...After we got halfway thru the door the couch got wedged a little...As we were trying to get it twisted into the right position I hear my buddy say" Move it towards the house"....I repsond..."I'm in the f'ing house!"
Same buddy on a returning from a Canada fishing trip...As they pull up to the border patrol and stop the border agent asks em" Where you guys coming from?" My buddy responds " Canada.....lol I wasn't there but I heard that the agent couldn't figure out if he was serious or being a smart a$$.
 

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Honey......I'm leaving you.......................................................................................................................................................................
 

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I get a lot of weird questions from people. The most common one, "Is that all you do is fish?"
 

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I have one buddy, well actually I have more than one, that calls and when I answer he says " You at home ? " I usually say no but he keeps talkin anyhow....
 

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This one is classic.
My youngest daughter came home from work one night and told my wife that a boy she works with thought my wife was was hot, and wanted to go out and fool around sometime. My wife quite proud of herself at this point spouted off " I could teach that young pup a trick or two" Without delay, and never looking up from the computer I said, "he likely already knows roll over and play dead". The laughter was deafening, and I got punched right between the shoulder blades.
 

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We mission plan for two hours, then fly a 2-ship of F-111s from our base near London, England, landing as planned at RAF Leuchars (near St Andrews golf course) in Scotland. We meet ground ops crew at Base Ops, and the new navigator in other jet asks, "how close are we to Scotland." Ground crew guy in thick Scottish accent says "Hew thick er yer boots lad." Young nav learns valuable (expensive) lesson at the pub later that day... other aircrew drinks for free.:D
 

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Honey......I'm leaving you.......................................................................................................................................................................

You Sir are very lucky to hear that statement, me, I am still waiting ;)
 

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I work for a water dept and I was flagging traffic for a water main break when a lady pulls up and ask "are we ever going to have water again". i have to admit that i thought for a split second to answer no you are never going to have water again.
 

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Several years ago I decided to give my sister a call in Florida. A male voice answers and I asked if he had any cold beer if I show up? He laughs and says " you know we always have cold beer for you." Well we talk about fishing and our new boats and lots of other things and after about 20 minutes of this I say " well let me talk to Carla before she has a fit." His reply was " who's Carla?" Turns out I had dialed the wrong number!

We both got a big laugh out of that, but agreed that it was a nice conversation.
 

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Many moons ago before cell phones were around I stopped at a gas station very, very late at night to call my wife and apologize for not being home on time( 4 hrs and 10 beers late) and that I was on my way. It helped to reduce the wrath I would get and deserved when I would get home to announce my impending arrival. It would eliminate the first 30 minutes of where were you, why didn't you call, are you drunk, how would you like it if I went out drinking all night. Man I was a real smuck when I was younger and dumber.

This gas station (Shell station on Rome Hilliard)had two of those phone from your car phones. I pulled up and called my wife and when I hung up the phone rang. I picked it up and said hello. A mans voice asked me if I had ever thought about having sex with a man. I told him that I was drunk but not that drunk, NO!. He told me I should reconsider. I said who is this? He said I'm in the car at the other phone right in front of you. I expressed a few of my heart felt feelings towards him, hung up and drove home.

I love my cell phone.
 
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