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aging!!

Discussion in 'OGF Comedy Corner' started by DaleM, Feb 21, 2005.

  1. DaleM

    DaleM Original OGF Staff Member

    Subject: Aging


    A very elderly gentleman, (mid nineties) very well dressed, hair well groomed, great looking suit, flower in his lapel smelling slightly of a good after shave, presenting a well looked after image, walks into an upscale cocktail lounge. Seated at the bar is
    an elderly looking lady, (mid eighties). The gentleman walks over, sits along side of her, orders a drink, takes a sip, turns to her and says, "So tell me, do I come here often?"
    ******************************************************
    Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says...
    "Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you' re about my age. How do you feel?"
    Slim says, "I feel just like a new-born baby."
    "Really!? Like a new-born baby!?"
    "Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."
    *******************************************************
    An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
    The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."
    The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?"
    The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one that's red and has thorns."
    "Do you mean a rose?"
    "Yes, that's the one," replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"
    *******************************************************************
    Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman--already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet--who insisted he didn't need my help to leave
    the hospital. After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator. On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him.
    "I don't know," he said. "She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."
     
  2. katfish

    katfish Cats are where it's at!

    1,497
    114
    1,398
    Growing old is terrible.




    But it beats the alternative! :eek:
     

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